Monday, October 25 - I typically only write about the happy things in my life because my life is typically happy. But this threw me and broke me in a way. So often my supposed friends do things without inviting me. So many times I have had to "get over it" and just move on when I know I was left out. But this one really did throw me for a loop. These five families, all of whom I consider friends, went to Yellowstone together. Kendra was asked to watch the Child's dogs (so they knew we were home and available) and Simon had recently talked to Britton about wanting to go to Yellowstone. It has given me a lot of self-reflection and self-evaluation about who I am, who they are, and if I want to continue to hang my hat on these "friends". I found this quote and it is very appropriate for how I feel. I'm really never alone but the loneliness living here in this neighborhood/ward has been crushing at times and this time, like I said, it has broken me. I'm trying to move on, to heal, and it will come. But it won't be the same. Because I am not the same.
Tuesday, October 26 - It was crazy hair day at school. Ricki's hair didn't get as crazy as it has been in the past but Zack's longer hair was kind of fun to work on! :)
Wednesday, October 27 - Zack had Activity Days tonight and they all made skull cakes. They got to decorate them however they wanted. Zack's cute leader, Bonnie Farnsworth, sent me this picture of him. I love that he loves going to these activities and hanging out with his friends.
Thursday, October 28 - Tonight was our ward Halloween party. I didn't go because..."Ricki was sick". Actually, Ricki stayed home from school with a tummy ache and it got worse right before the activity so we really would have stayed home because of that. However, I did not want to go face those people in my ward. I have cried off and on, without provocation, for the past two days and I could not even fathom facing them tonight. So Ricki and I stayed home and watched a movie while the rest of the family went to the activity and had a good time.
Friday, October 29 - This morning was the kids' Halloween costume parade. They were so cute! I will miss these when these cute kiddos are too old to parade around in costumes!
Saturday, October 30 - Even though Halloween is actually tomorrow, we celebrated it today. Kendra went to a friend's party, Nick went to Parker Moon's house, Simon took Zack and Ricki around trick-or-treating, and Amie came over to spend the evening with me. She and I commiserated over things that are going on in our lives. We laughed, we cried...we BFF'ed it up! :) I love hanging out with her. I just feels so normal - and I needed some normal in my life tonight!
Sunday, October 31 - Mom and dad threw their annual Halloween party for Sunday dinner. We had a super yummy Halloween-themed dinner, Mom had some really cute/fun games for the kids to play, we made caramel apples, and we had a costume fashion show. It was really fun! The perfect ending to the Halloween season!
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